What cappytan said ^^ !
Welcome spud, take your time. I'm two years into the process of awakening, I blew my load too soon with the missus, the elders investigated me, I had to sloooow down and find out where I stood before I had the confidence to talk to the other half honestly. I didn't think it would take this long, but it is a process and we have to have patience.
As for the God thing, I don't believe we can know. What I do believe is there's overwhelming evidence for evolution, and IF at the end we find out there IS a God then so be it. I can't choose what to believe. He'll understand!
My outlook is so fresh and bright now, the world was all wicked and doomed when I was a believer, but now, despite the bad stuff, I see SO MANY good people doing selfless things trying to make the world better for others WITHOUT the motivation of fear or guilt or the dangling carrot of a reward. Life is precious and beautiful and hopefully by the time I'm about to die they'll be able to do rejuvenating head transplants!